Song: Composure-August Burns Red.
Too much to fucking think about tonight. And its all cuz of this song...or mostly.
Tonight tho, before i listened to this song even, I've felt confused. I still don't know WHAT to think. As in, i c a n ' t think. Idk what this is still and its got a tight hold of me...Thats for sure. I know i WANT to cut..But i don't know if i will...blah.
This song made me realize tho that i REALLY do need to let go. All the things that have happened in the past three years that are keeping me here..
-Jon leaving me for some random girl
-Trace killing himself over me.
-Charlie
-Jared who just fucked up my self esteem...
-All the guys that HAVE hurt me.
-Jake and his psychoticness
-All of the tit shows i shouldn't have done.
-The cutting that has destroyed so many things in my life..
-The eating disorders...
FUCK.
I figure laying it all out for everyone to see might help. Maybe Its a stupid idea...but eh.
I just WANT to let go. Badly. So...why c a n ' t I?
I have no idea....
but i have nothing else to say at the moment...
Send me messages on yer thoughts to Katie.goes.rawrz@gmail.com. Cuz half the people that read these aren't followers. blah yeah
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Keep it together....
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